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HEALING IS NOT ALWAYS BEAUTIFUL.

INTRODUCTION.

Why Many Young People Are Healing the Wrong Way.

We’re living in a time where the word “healing” is everywhere. You hear it in conversations, see it on social media and read it in captions. But the truth is, many young people are not really healing  they’re hiding. They’re covering up pain with habits that feel good for a moment but leave deeper scars later.

Most don’t talk about it, but you can see it:

- In the way they party every weekend just to avoid being alone.

- In the way they jump into relationship after relationship to feel wanted.

- In the way they use substances to numb emotions they don’t know how to process.


This is the quiet reality: Many are hurting, but they don’t know how to deal with it  so they call their avoidance “healing.”


Why This Is Happening


Most of us were never taught how to handle emotional pain. From a young age, we were told things like:

- “Be strong.”

- “Move on.”

- “Don’t overthink it.”

- “Everyone goes through things.”

 So we learned to push it down. And now as adults, we confuse survival with healing. We don’t give ourselves space to feel because we’re scared of what might come up. When pain shows up again, we reach for anything that can silence it fast.

That’s why many young people:

- Drink when they’re anxious.

- Stay busy so they don’t have to think.

- Stay in toxic friendships or relationships just to avoid being alone.


Fake Healing vs. Real Healing.

It’s easy to fall into fake healing because it looks normal. It even feels like progress. But it’s temporary. It’s the kind of healing that distracts you, not restores you.

Fake healing:

- Using social media to vent, but never having real conversations

- Telling yourself you’ve “moved on” but still checking their profile

- Smiling in front of others while feeling completely numb inside

- Replacing real connection with shallow distractions


Real healing is different. 

It’s uncomfortable. It takes time. And it often requires you to sit in pain without running from it.

What Real Healing Looks Like

Real healing isn’t about pretending everything is fine. It’s about being honest with yourself. It means saying, “I’m not okay right now, but I’m working on it.” It means allowing yourself to feel anger, sadness, grief, and disappointment without pushing those feelings away.

Real healing is:

- Taking a break from people who hurt you, even if you miss them

- Asking for help when you’re overwhelmed

- Creating boundaries, even if it makes others uncomfortable

- Choosing to rest instead of numbing out with distractions

- Learning how to sit with your emotions instead of escaping them


Why It’s So Hard to Heal the Right Way

Because the real work is slow, quiet, and painful.  
You don’t get instant relief. You don’t get likes or praise.To be precise,most of the time, you’re doing it alone.
But this kind of healing lasts. It helps you understand why you react the way you do. It helps you let go of things that don’t serve you anymore. It helps you grow not just cover the pain. It lets your heart pour all the past you have gone through 😤 and ready to give it a chance again.

What Can Help You Start Healing Right

If you’re in that place where you’re tired of pretending and want to actually get better  here are small steps that can help:

- Talk to someone— a friend, mentor, therapist. Don’t keep it inside.

-Write it down— get your thoughts out of your head. Journaling helps more than you think.

- Let yourself feel — cry, scream, take quiet time. Stop bottling it up.

- Cut off what hurts you — even if it’s hard. Healing requires space.

- Be patient — some days you’ll feel okay, other days you’ll feel broken again. That’s normal.

Final Thoughts:

You Deserve Real Healing.It is not about looking strong,It’s about getting better for real.  
It’s okay to be hurt. It’s okay to be lost.  
But you don’t have to stay there.  
Start by choosing one thing today that brings peace instead of distraction.
Your healing matters  even if no one else sees it yet.  
Do it for yourself. Not to look okay, but to actually be okay.
 You can’t do that if you keep hiding behind things that only make the pain worse later.

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